1. if you have no life - and you can PROVE it mathematically.
2. if you know vector calculus but you can't remember how to do long division.
3. if you chuckle whenever anyone says "centrifugal force."
4. if you've actually used every single function on your graphing calculator.
5. if it is sunny and 70 degrees outside, and you are working on a computer.
6. if you frequently whistle the theme song to "MacGyver."
7. if you know how to integrate a chicken and can take the derivative of water.
8. if you think in "math."
9. if you've calculated that the World Series actually diverges.
10. if you hesitate to look at something because you don't want to break down its wave function.
11. if you laugh at jokes about mathematicians.
12. if the Humane society has you arrested because you actually performed the Schroedinger's Cat experiment.
13. if you can translate English into Binary.
14. if you have to bring a jacket with you, in the middle of summer, because there's a wind-chill factor in the lab.
15. if you are completely addicted to caffeine.
16. if you avoid doing anything because you don't want to contribute to the eventual heat-death of the universe.
17. if you consider ANY non-science course "easy."
18. if when your professor asks you where your homework is, you claim to have accidentally determined its momentum so precisely, that according to Heisenberg it could be anywhere in the universe.
19. if the "fun" center of your brain has deteriorated from lack of use.
20. if you'll assume that a "horse" is a "sphere" in order to make the math easier.
21. if the water in your kettle is boiling at 373 Kelvin.
22. if you know that the velocity of light is 299,792.5 km/sec.
23. if you know the direction the water swirls when you flush.
24. if you've already calculated how much you earn per second.
25. if you are sure that differential equations are a very useful tool.
26. if you are at an air show and know how fast the skydivers are falling.
27. if you know the second law of thermodynamics, but not your own shirt size.
28. if you avoid stirring your coffee because you don't want to increase the entropy of the universe.
29. if you try to explain entropy to strangers at your table during casual dinner conversation.
30. if your three year old son asks why the sky is blue and you try to explain atmospheric absorption theory.
31. if you're at a wine tasting event and find yourself paying more attention to the cork screws than the Chardonnay.
32. if you carry on a one-hour debate over the expected results of an experiment that actually takes five minutes to run.
33. if you understood more than five of these indicators.
34. if you make a hard copy of this list, and post it on your door.
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